…my daughter is reading.

It’s been a real struggle to get her to read. Which is weird, because she loves books. She keeps them with her everywhere and bedtime stories are one of her favorite parts of the day. But actually reading by herself? Lukewarm.

Last night she read a primer in record time, probably because she couldn’t wait for me to keep reading a novel to her and she knew she had to do her homework first. Whatever works, man. I’m just happy there’s progress.


…I can create custom primer books.

My daughter refuses to read. She can read; she just doesn’t want to. Mostly because she’s got two choices: either the story is good, but too far beyond her current level, or it’s at her level and the payoff is some shit like, “Brushing teeth is fun.”

Finding books she’s gives a fuck about has proven to be tough. So I wrote and illustrated a Level 1 book about Tom’s butt and his fart problems. She read that faster than anything else.

I’m spending my Thanksgiving break writing sequels.


…we just got a new book in the good series my kids like.

In contrast to yesterday’s dreck, the Beep and Bob series is pretty fun. It’s entertaining and brisk and just an overall good time before bed.

Plus the author is a fellow Marylander, so that’s a neat bonus.

Jonathan, please write another one. We’re on book four already and pickings look slim after this. I can’t go back to more half-dicked license cash-ins. I just can’t.


…I’m almost done reading this awful Minecraft book series.

Minecraft is an extremely versatile universe. Somehow, the author of this series missed that and went for the most basic, literal, and painfully superficial path to tell a story.

Naturally my kids loved it and wanted to hear all of them at bedtime. Ugh.

Nothing even fucking happens in Book 2. The characters walk up to a mountain, find a crystal, then repeatedly run away from monsters for another 18 chapters. There are six books of this.

But we’re on the last one now, thankfully. I should write one just so I don’t lose my goddamn mind next time.


…my county’s library system is well-funded.

Public services are fucking awesome, guys. Really wish people would quit trying to ruin them.

The Anne Arundel County Public Library system may not even rank among the best in the state, for all I know. I haven’t been keeping up with Libraries Monthly. Whatever its rank, it’s a great system. Tons of choices, tons of ways to check out, great online support.

Got nothing but good things to say. They’ve kept me in a steady supply of kids’ books since we started making weekly trips. Sometimes the kids still demand that I read something for the 60th time and I go into a dissociative state, but most of our rotation is fresh, and I couldn’t have done it without AACPL.

In the most genuine way, I mean this: the public library has kept me sane during the pandemic.